Ovid’s description says that love its natural pain that you have to “capture” or be “captured”. He also says that love can not be corrupted and that love could make any ugly person shine. For him love could change anything in a person and that if you love someone you have to serve to that person. Love could be erotic or spiritual. He gives us some rules in order to find our truth love. http://www.cosmopolitan.com/syndication/have-the-talk-2. An article that cut my attention it’s ‘how to have that talk’ sometimes we women think that we found the right person and we expect the guy to feel the same way and we ask them where the relationship is going. This article suggests that before you put yourself and him in this situation ask yourself where you want this to go. It might be that you are busy planning your career and although you think you love him you are not ready for such a commitment so why bother.
He talks about “all women can be won” In Men’s health web page http://www.menshealth.com/cda/advicedetail an article “my dream girl dumped me how do I get her back” it talks about all the possibilities that he has to get her back. It only takes time to listen to her needs and what was the problem. But the real questions are “weather the so called dream girl is really worth the trouble.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
"Love is the soul's recognition of its counterpoint in another", as stated in a very famous movie, could be an accurate definition of love. People have endlessly studied the concept of love for many years; some think is a chemical reaction that the brain produces in the presence of the love one that has other implications in some other section of the body, while others express their knowledge of love in a more spiritual sense. Reading an article of Man's magazine about the characteristics of love, it is perceived that men and women have unique opinions about the concept although it is believed that the idea should bound the together. The article expresses that women react more sensitive to relationship implying love than men. On the other hand, men tend to be more practical and physical towards the situation. Based on the article, Courtly love, we see that at the beginning that the definition of love is pure and sensitive. Subsequently, the notion of women enjoying pleasure more than men reflect an unrealistic conclusion in terms of the culture of the time.
Monday, October 20, 2008
bfilip courtly love
It seems as though in the areas of finding love and getting over love, the advice of Ovid has survived the test of time and is the same for women as men.
Ovid gives advice on where to find a woman to love. “To find a fitting mistress, use your eyes. The hunter learns where stags are to be snared, And in what glens the tusky boar is laired; So you who’re on a lasting love intent Must learn the spots that damsels most frequent.” Online at menshealth.com, in the article” Women, Here's the Best Place to Find a Man” women are also told to look where there will be many choices. “The winner? San Jose, California. The city at the southern end of San Francisco Bay has the greatest concentration of single, intelligent, physically fit men who love high-adrenaline activities.”
In the Cosmopolitan online article “How to Get Over Him: The No B.S. Guide to Surviving a Breakup” the advice seems to be similar to Ovid’s. Women are told not to call for 90 days and do other things to keep their mind off their ex. Ovid in his advice. Stated, your indifference is enough. This ignoring will help cure you of your scorned love. When asked “Can revenge ever be good therapy, like flirting with his best friend or spreading a nasty rumor about him?” the expert replied” The best revenge is getting on with your life and living it to the fullest.” Ovid’s advice was similar. “Who ends love hating comments fall on the wrong side. is still in love and can’t easily let go of sorrow.” His advice is that you will only be hurting yourself.
Tiresias was turned into a woman for separating copulating snakes. One could take this to mean that he was punished for doing the female a dis-service by interrupting her pleasure. However, as a female he became a prostitute which is not recognized as a pleasure receiving position. Perhaps, when he stated that women receive more pleasure from sexual acts, he was remembering how hard he had to work to please a man as a female prostitute. The fact that he spent years as a female, certainly gave him great insight into the society’s structure and the position of women.
I agree with some of Capellanus' text regarding love. For example, he states “27. A lover can never have enough of the embraces of his beloved.” I believe this is true due to the fact that humans are social animals and were turn to our lover to satisfy our emotional needs as well as our need for affection. However, He states “13. Love rarely lasts when it is revealed.” I do not agree. It is my belief that love is more likely to last when it is boasted of and publicly bolstered. This to me is one of the purposes of the marriage ceremony, to publicly acknowledge the love and coupling, therefore strengthening the bond. If it not revealed it is not of the reality of life.
Ovid gives advice on where to find a woman to love. “To find a fitting mistress, use your eyes. The hunter learns where stags are to be snared, And in what glens the tusky boar is laired; So you who’re on a lasting love intent Must learn the spots that damsels most frequent.” Online at menshealth.com, in the article” Women, Here's the Best Place to Find a Man” women are also told to look where there will be many choices. “The winner? San Jose, California. The city at the southern end of San Francisco Bay has the greatest concentration of single, intelligent, physically fit men who love high-adrenaline activities.”
In the Cosmopolitan online article “How to Get Over Him: The No B.S. Guide to Surviving a Breakup” the advice seems to be similar to Ovid’s. Women are told not to call for 90 days and do other things to keep their mind off their ex. Ovid in his advice. Stated, your indifference is enough. This ignoring will help cure you of your scorned love. When asked “Can revenge ever be good therapy, like flirting with his best friend or spreading a nasty rumor about him?” the expert replied” The best revenge is getting on with your life and living it to the fullest.” Ovid’s advice was similar. “Who ends love hating comments fall on the wrong side. is still in love and can’t easily let go of sorrow.” His advice is that you will only be hurting yourself.
Tiresias was turned into a woman for separating copulating snakes. One could take this to mean that he was punished for doing the female a dis-service by interrupting her pleasure. However, as a female he became a prostitute which is not recognized as a pleasure receiving position. Perhaps, when he stated that women receive more pleasure from sexual acts, he was remembering how hard he had to work to please a man as a female prostitute. The fact that he spent years as a female, certainly gave him great insight into the society’s structure and the position of women.
I agree with some of Capellanus' text regarding love. For example, he states “27. A lover can never have enough of the embraces of his beloved.” I believe this is true due to the fact that humans are social animals and were turn to our lover to satisfy our emotional needs as well as our need for affection. However, He states “13. Love rarely lasts when it is revealed.” I do not agree. It is my belief that love is more likely to last when it is boasted of and publicly bolstered. This to me is one of the purposes of the marriage ceremony, to publicly acknowledge the love and coupling, therefore strengthening the bond. If it not revealed it is not of the reality of life.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
According to the website www.Cosmospolitan.com, when loved ones are going through a rough time in their relationship, the best way to prevent yourself from experiencing pain and heartache is to ask legitimate questions based on the issues that may have caused the problem. Also take a break if you are too upset to talk rationally since this may increase the possibilities of more complex problems and confusion. Also, Ivy Black wrote an article on october 6th 2008 on the website www.socyberty.com stating that 99% of relationships will run into problems, he also explained in the article that when couples are going through a tough time in a relationship, avoidance is the worst way to deal with a problem in a relationship, instead they should address the issue soon and communication is the best relationship advice where love is concerned. comparing both views from the previous websites to On how to deal with love and cure yourself from heartache, i think that Ovid's advice goes complementary with the websites in that one should avoid lonely places and also instead of instigating an emotional problem, never hate the other party and if a love one goes away, keep your options open and dont shut everyone else off from you since such an act will never stop the moaning.
Tiresias who in Ovid's metamorphoses, lived life as both male and female. The transformation came about when Tiresias once saw two serpents mating and struck them apart killing the female and because of the existence of magic and gods he was turned into woman. As a result because he lived life as both sexes he was called upon to settle a dispute between hera and zeus concering who enjoys sex more, man or woman. Hera prepare him to be more insightful due to the fact that he first blinded by hera and as a result zeus gave him inner sight which is the ability to see the future. i think that Hera determination that women enjoy sex more than men came about because as a woman he lived life as a prostitute and i think then he experienced all the different sexual pleasures a woman experiences with her body (for egs orgasms, pleasure of the breast etc)
for the most part, i agree with Calleneus characteristics of love and his rules on love. this is so because i think most of his rules are logical where true love is concerned for egs i think that one has to be jealous to love and that love is either growing or diminishing. however some of his rules i may not agree with such as rule no. 13. i dont think love rarely lasts when revealed because then it would not have been love in the first place.
Tiresias who in Ovid's metamorphoses, lived life as both male and female. The transformation came about when Tiresias once saw two serpents mating and struck them apart killing the female and because of the existence of magic and gods he was turned into woman. As a result because he lived life as both sexes he was called upon to settle a dispute between hera and zeus concering who enjoys sex more, man or woman. Hera prepare him to be more insightful due to the fact that he first blinded by hera and as a result zeus gave him inner sight which is the ability to see the future. i think that Hera determination that women enjoy sex more than men came about because as a woman he lived life as a prostitute and i think then he experienced all the different sexual pleasures a woman experiences with her body (for egs orgasms, pleasure of the breast etc)
for the most part, i agree with Calleneus characteristics of love and his rules on love. this is so because i think most of his rules are logical where true love is concerned for egs i think that one has to be jealous to love and that love is either growing or diminishing. however some of his rules i may not agree with such as rule no. 13. i dont think love rarely lasts when revealed because then it would not have been love in the first place.
Friday, October 17, 2008
courtly love
1. The description that is given is a very affectionate and loving. He explains that in order to look for real love someone must really look for it. As he explains the origin of “love” which comes from the word “hook” which signifies “being captured” and is something that one must look for with their eyes rather than wait for it to come. He explains how loves bring out the beauty of oneself and that even a really ugly person and rude can all of a sudden be pretty because he shines of love. He goes on to explain that ones you find love, cherish it and be generous, always do what Is pleasing to your loved one. He says that it’s important to always look good, dress nicely so the clothes will fit on you exactly. If you fight and make her upset, prove your case, if you need to cry, cry tears can always help. Be gentle and if you want to kiss your lovers lips, don’t be too harsh. Be original, and always surprise her. If love ends, try not to think about her too much. Just think of the bad things that your loved one did. There is no reason to be alone for you will only think of her more. According to Connie Regan, a relationship advisor “Men would rather discuss almost anything rather than things that are so personal to them. Men will pretend that breaking up with their woman was no big deal but, in reality, they may be on the verge of breaking down at any time. If you are feeling depressed and unhappy about a recent breakup look for someone that you can be open and honest with about how you are feeling” http://ezinearticles.com/?Why-Men-Handle-Breakups-Differently-Than-Women---Men-and-The-Way-They-Handle-It-When-They-Breakup&id=576989. Men today turn to pretend like a break-up is nothing for them. They can’t show their real feelings because their ego sometimes is too high. They always try to pretend like they do not really care “As a guy I think us men are scared to show many of our emotions. I recently broke up with my girlfriend and it affected me a lot. However, since I didn't feel comfortable talking to our friends about my inner pain, it just kind of built up and burned a whole inside of me” http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070420000513AADuGor.
2. Tiresias who experienced love with both sexes. She has been transformed into a women for seven years and therefore, was able to experience the joy of sex with from both sexes. In an argument between Zeus and Hera regarding who enjoys sex more women or men, Hera said the Men while Zeus said the Women. According to Tiresias who has experienced from both genders she said “that she receives the greater pleasure: "Often parts a man enjoys one only." 2008.Google.14 Oct 2008. Since Hera did not like what Tiresias said and punished him with blindness. Zeus, who had no control over that, gave him at least the gift of foresight. The incidence that occurred with Hera, made Tiresias be more careful with what he says. Sometimes he realizes that he should not say the whole truth as it gets him in trouble. Similary as in Oedipus the Kind, where Tiresias again was blamed as Oedipus insults him by calling him a liar and refusing to believe what Tiresias had to say. The fact that Tiresias inclined that women enjoy sex more than man implies men usually do it for the sake of doing it, because they have the need too, while women are more attached and get emotionally into it and out of love and deep care.
3. Capellanus’ imposes certain rules for being in love that I do not personally agree to all of them. For example he says that no one can really have two loves, which in this case I agree because a person cannot be in love with two people at the same time. Loving two people is not a true love. He also goes on to explain that you can’t love someone after a certain age. Which in this case I completely disagree with it, as people can always find love at different age, as my great-grandfather got remarried at age 98. So I do believe that people can find love at any period of their life. I do agree when he says that a “new love expels an old one” unfortunately today, after two people break up, it’s hard to truly forget about someone until you find a new love. I would have to strongly disagree with what he says that “blindness impedes love, for a blind man cannot see that on which his mind can reflect immoderately.” This is a very harsh statement to say as everyone, with any disability can find love. Looks, is not everything in life, and people can fall in love just by personality, as in my opinion the personality builds the looks. I would have to say that some of the things are true and I would agree with them, but there are a few that I cannot agree with. Everyone should have the opportunity to find true love, whenever and wherever they desire.
2. Tiresias who experienced love with both sexes. She has been transformed into a women for seven years and therefore, was able to experience the joy of sex with from both sexes. In an argument between Zeus and Hera regarding who enjoys sex more women or men, Hera said the Men while Zeus said the Women. According to Tiresias who has experienced from both genders she said “that she receives the greater pleasure: "Often parts a man enjoys one only." 2008.Google.14 Oct 2008. Since Hera did not like what Tiresias said and punished him with blindness. Zeus, who had no control over that, gave him at least the gift of foresight. The incidence that occurred with Hera, made Tiresias be more careful with what he says. Sometimes he realizes that he should not say the whole truth as it gets him in trouble. Similary as in Oedipus the Kind, where Tiresias again was blamed as Oedipus insults him by calling him a liar and refusing to believe what Tiresias had to say. The fact that Tiresias inclined that women enjoy sex more than man implies men usually do it for the sake of doing it, because they have the need too, while women are more attached and get emotionally into it and out of love and deep care.
3. Capellanus’ imposes certain rules for being in love that I do not personally agree to all of them. For example he says that no one can really have two loves, which in this case I agree because a person cannot be in love with two people at the same time. Loving two people is not a true love. He also goes on to explain that you can’t love someone after a certain age. Which in this case I completely disagree with it, as people can always find love at different age, as my great-grandfather got remarried at age 98. So I do believe that people can find love at any period of their life. I do agree when he says that a “new love expels an old one” unfortunately today, after two people break up, it’s hard to truly forget about someone until you find a new love. I would have to strongly disagree with what he says that “blindness impedes love, for a blind man cannot see that on which his mind can reflect immoderately.” This is a very harsh statement to say as everyone, with any disability can find love. Looks, is not everything in life, and people can fall in love just by personality, as in my opinion the personality builds the looks. I would have to say that some of the things are true and I would agree with them, but there are a few that I cannot agree with. Everyone should have the opportunity to find true love, whenever and wherever they desire.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Love
1. Many women magazines, especially, spend a lot of space on giving women advice to let them know whether the men that they are with are the one. If the men that they are dating are they’re one true love. In Cosmopolitan I took a quiz that was suppose to let you know whether you are with your boyfriend because you are in love with him or because he is just there. The questions asked what you felt when you saw him, what type of music you listened to, whether you looked forward to seeing him, whether you felt like pleasing him, and a couple of more intimate questions. The type questions that were asked, I guess one can say that the image of love does fit with Ovid’s image of love. Ovid’s image of love is whether you look forward to that “embrace” from that significant other. In the questions that were asked in the quiz, it asked whether you looked forward to having sex with your significant other, or whether you saw it as a chore. Another similarity can be said to be in the Cosmo quiz which asked whether you were there to please him, and where Ovid said that love is not about greed. Now there are more details to how to mend a broken heart. One article says to start a journal in which you write out everything that you are feeling, and to keep yourself as active as you can. Also to “Find someone in your life whom you can depend on or share feelings with like your mom, your best friend, even your dog.” (http://www.wikihow.com/Cure-a-Heartache) Another article says about the same to activities that will keep you busy, “Start a workout routine that gets your blood and heart pumping”, start a new life style, trying to keep your mind away from the pain. (http://www.ehow.com/how_2386909_cure-heartache.html) Cosmo gives the same idea, but also adds to go out with your friends, and that there is nothing wrong with having a rebound guy. (http://www.cosmopolitan.com/celebrities/exclusive/How-to-Get-Over-Him-The-No-BS-Guide?click=main_sr). Ovid says to avoid lonely places, which is the same as a rebound or a day out with your friends. He also says to let those feelings of loneliness to make you bitter.
2. Tiresias was turned into a woman, when he struck two snakes that were “copulating”. He was once again turned into a man, when he once again saw two snakes “copulating” nd struck them again. When Hera and Zeus were arguing about who enjoys sex more men and women, and having being both, they asked Tiresias. Tiresias said that women enjoy sex more. Hera as a result blinded Tiresias, Zeus was not able to stop her but gave him the power of prophecy. I believe that women do enjoy sex more. From the accounts that I have heard, it seems that men are easily pleased, while it takes a lot more for a women to be sexually pleased. By logic, something that is harder to obtain, is more rewarding, than something that can be easily obtained. I have heard that a woman is able to enjoy sex on different levels, while for men it is only one basic level. Tiresias was able to have this insight because he has seen life as both men and women. As a result of Hera’s ultimate punishment of blindness he was given the power of prophecy. This power was seen in Oedipus the King, when Tiresias early on in the play reveals the truth and how Oedipus will ultimate end up. Tiresias reveals that the land is ill because Oedipus is their King, when he is both husband and son. Oedipus blindness and exile is also revealed through Tiresias prophecy.
3. When reading the characteristics and laws for love, some of them I agree with, and then there are others in which I am not convinced. The romantic meaning that I see in his characteristics of love, I agree with. For example, when a person is in love, they have that period where all that they can do is think of their beloved. No matter what one is doing your mind ends up in the same place, your beloved. Another example is that when one sees their beloved they instantly smile, and sigh. Then there are other characteristics of love, which I also agree with, but they have more of a biblical definition. In which it says “Love is patient, love is kind, love is not jealous, love does not brag and is not arrogant, love does not act becomingly, Love does not rejoice in unrighteousness but rejoices with the truth, Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” (Corinthians 13:4-13). When I read some of the characteristics, this is what popped into my mind. Some of the ideas Ovid alludes to, and I agree with them. Then there are other characteristics, which Ovid mentions that seem to more of protocols, such as how old do you have to be to fall in love, how much time to wait after your beloved has died. These types of protocols do not fit into the idea of love. When love seems to be this power, this freedom, something magical, setting protocols does not seem to fit into the idea of love. Love is unpredictable, and one cannot set rules on something that is unpredictable.
2. Tiresias was turned into a woman, when he struck two snakes that were “copulating”. He was once again turned into a man, when he once again saw two snakes “copulating” nd struck them again. When Hera and Zeus were arguing about who enjoys sex more men and women, and having being both, they asked Tiresias. Tiresias said that women enjoy sex more. Hera as a result blinded Tiresias, Zeus was not able to stop her but gave him the power of prophecy. I believe that women do enjoy sex more. From the accounts that I have heard, it seems that men are easily pleased, while it takes a lot more for a women to be sexually pleased. By logic, something that is harder to obtain, is more rewarding, than something that can be easily obtained. I have heard that a woman is able to enjoy sex on different levels, while for men it is only one basic level. Tiresias was able to have this insight because he has seen life as both men and women. As a result of Hera’s ultimate punishment of blindness he was given the power of prophecy. This power was seen in Oedipus the King, when Tiresias early on in the play reveals the truth and how Oedipus will ultimate end up. Tiresias reveals that the land is ill because Oedipus is their King, when he is both husband and son. Oedipus blindness and exile is also revealed through Tiresias prophecy.
3. When reading the characteristics and laws for love, some of them I agree with, and then there are others in which I am not convinced. The romantic meaning that I see in his characteristics of love, I agree with. For example, when a person is in love, they have that period where all that they can do is think of their beloved. No matter what one is doing your mind ends up in the same place, your beloved. Another example is that when one sees their beloved they instantly smile, and sigh. Then there are other characteristics of love, which I also agree with, but they have more of a biblical definition. In which it says “Love is patient, love is kind, love is not jealous, love does not brag and is not arrogant, love does not act becomingly, Love does not rejoice in unrighteousness but rejoices with the truth, Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” (Corinthians 13:4-13). When I read some of the characteristics, this is what popped into my mind. Some of the ideas Ovid alludes to, and I agree with them. Then there are other characteristics, which Ovid mentions that seem to more of protocols, such as how old do you have to be to fall in love, how much time to wait after your beloved has died. These types of protocols do not fit into the idea of love. When love seems to be this power, this freedom, something magical, setting protocols does not seem to fit into the idea of love. Love is unpredictable, and one cannot set rules on something that is unpredictable.
Courtly Love Readings
1. The Ovid’s rule is the reference book to attract him/her and how to keep the relationship. The way to attract him/her in present and Ovid’s description has similar points. Both are care about others. Ovid’s said, ” Night hides each fault, each blemish forgot“. People tried to creep into his/her favor and tried to respect other’s opinion. Also, the trust is the important to keep the relationship. “Sweet boy, I’ve not betrayed you and make her dance if she can’t move her arms.” However, there are difference between modern rule and Ovid’s rule. In present, he/she better to show the financial manner and ability. “Tip well: Grab the check, mentally divide the bill by 10, double that number, and throw down the tip. Do it quickly but casually. Believe me, she'll be watching.” (Men’s Health Magazine, “20 Simple Tips for the Perfect Date”). “Buy Him a Drink” (Cosmo Online, “How to Ask a Guy Out”). The modern rile and Ovid’s rule has similar way to cure from heartache. Ovid’s said “A new love expels an old one.” When I console his/her in heartache, I would encourage in meeting new love to forget old love. Also, I would encourage him/her “All men/women can be won.”
2. Tiresias lost his sight. Tiresias saw snakes were copulating. He shut off snakes by sticks and hurt female snake. Suddenly he became woman. Seven years later, he saw snakes were copulating at the same place. He did the same thing he did past and he became man. While he was woman, he already got married. Therefore he had a experience having a sex with both man and woman. One day Zeus and Hera had argued about which sex feel more enjoyment while having a sex. However, they did not have answer for it because they do not know how opposite sex feel while having a sex. Therefore, they decided to ask Tiresias, because he know both woman and man’ feeling. Tiresias honestly answered what he thought if the maximum enjoyment of the sex is 10, and then woman feels 9 and man feel 1. When Hera heard Tiresias opinion, she upset and she make him blind. Zeus felt sorry for Tiresias receiving an insult. Zeus gave Tiresias ablility to make a predictions and long life which is 7 times than human life.
Since Tiresias became a blind, he would be more careful to listen and speak a word. There are some situations that tell truth is not good solution. People should consider what going to say depends on the situation and circumstances. In the story of the “Oedipus the King”, Tiresias did not want to tell the truth to the Oedipus. He did not want to put himself difficult situation by telling the truth. He just left the truth and wait until Oedipus knew. Sometime do not tell the truth or white lie will be better than telling the truth.
I do not agree Tiresias decision about enjoyment of the sex. I believe the sex is the one of the expression of love. If a couple loves each other, I think they feel equally. Sex has not only physical enjoyment but also enjoyment of the spirits.
3. I think the Tiresias’ rule of the love is well listed. These are the basic rule of the lovers even at the present. Also I thought he was honest. He said “Marriage is no excuse for not loving” and “Love always departs from the dwelling place of avarice.” I think these subjects are not easy to mention. I agree with most of his rules. However, I cannot agree with the rule that “If a lover suspects another, jealousy and the effects of love increase.” I believe that love is based on the trust each other. When a lover begins to suspects another, it is endless and it could lead misunderstanding and trouble. Also I do not agree with the rule that “A new love expels an old one.” I know most of time a new love expels an old one. However, there is a word that “man is not able to forget first love.” So do I. I know that love diminish but I want to believe that true love will be last forever.
2. Tiresias lost his sight. Tiresias saw snakes were copulating. He shut off snakes by sticks and hurt female snake. Suddenly he became woman. Seven years later, he saw snakes were copulating at the same place. He did the same thing he did past and he became man. While he was woman, he already got married. Therefore he had a experience having a sex with both man and woman. One day Zeus and Hera had argued about which sex feel more enjoyment while having a sex. However, they did not have answer for it because they do not know how opposite sex feel while having a sex. Therefore, they decided to ask Tiresias, because he know both woman and man’ feeling. Tiresias honestly answered what he thought if the maximum enjoyment of the sex is 10, and then woman feels 9 and man feel 1. When Hera heard Tiresias opinion, she upset and she make him blind. Zeus felt sorry for Tiresias receiving an insult. Zeus gave Tiresias ablility to make a predictions and long life which is 7 times than human life.
Since Tiresias became a blind, he would be more careful to listen and speak a word. There are some situations that tell truth is not good solution. People should consider what going to say depends on the situation and circumstances. In the story of the “Oedipus the King”, Tiresias did not want to tell the truth to the Oedipus. He did not want to put himself difficult situation by telling the truth. He just left the truth and wait until Oedipus knew. Sometime do not tell the truth or white lie will be better than telling the truth.
I do not agree Tiresias decision about enjoyment of the sex. I believe the sex is the one of the expression of love. If a couple loves each other, I think they feel equally. Sex has not only physical enjoyment but also enjoyment of the spirits.
3. I think the Tiresias’ rule of the love is well listed. These are the basic rule of the lovers even at the present. Also I thought he was honest. He said “Marriage is no excuse for not loving” and “Love always departs from the dwelling place of avarice.” I think these subjects are not easy to mention. I agree with most of his rules. However, I cannot agree with the rule that “If a lover suspects another, jealousy and the effects of love increase.” I believe that love is based on the trust each other. When a lover begins to suspects another, it is endless and it could lead misunderstanding and trouble. Also I do not agree with the rule that “A new love expels an old one.” I know most of time a new love expels an old one. However, there is a word that “man is not able to forget first love.” So do I. I know that love diminish but I want to believe that true love will be last forever.
Courtly Love
1. In my opinion Ovid presents a guidelines to find a "perfect" love. He gives us a list of what people should do and how to behave in certain situations, chasing their true love. Personally, I like the idea with hunter and how he knows where to set up a trap for the game. I found bunch of articles with clues where to find a blind date. For example, http://www.inlander.com/bestof2002/277238642616056.php says that the best place to meet a blind date is Starbucks. Is it true. I don’t know, I’m not a coffee drinker. In addition Ovid wants to tell us that people who are looking for love must omit lonely places. He says that they’re harmful.
2. Tiresias had to be chosen the one (by punishment) to experience sense of love from both sides: men and women. I think that both sexes look at love from different perspectives. For example, my wife states that women are more emotionally toward love. It may be truth. Tiresias being both saxes have a comparison how men and women enjoy sex. He wasn’t afraid to conclude in front of Zeus and Hera, that women have more enjoyable sex emotion than men. When Tiresias got blinded by Hera he might experience sex even more deeply because his other senses were stimulate more.
3. Love can be an inborn suffering only if it is not reciprocated. When two people are in love there are "caught in chains" of love but they have a choice. They can choose to be in this relationship and they are not forced by " being caught with the hook". Fish can always escape. Every human can fall in love whether they are 10 or 100 years old but the feeling matures in us as we get older and we experience and learn more. Men are visual beings but what they see isn’t always what they get., it takes more to fall in love. That’s why it’s possible to blind man to fall in love. A true love is blind and it lasts forever. It never dies no matter how old we get.
2. Tiresias had to be chosen the one (by punishment) to experience sense of love from both sides: men and women. I think that both sexes look at love from different perspectives. For example, my wife states that women are more emotionally toward love. It may be truth. Tiresias being both saxes have a comparison how men and women enjoy sex. He wasn’t afraid to conclude in front of Zeus and Hera, that women have more enjoyable sex emotion than men. When Tiresias got blinded by Hera he might experience sex even more deeply because his other senses were stimulate more.
3. Love can be an inborn suffering only if it is not reciprocated. When two people are in love there are "caught in chains" of love but they have a choice. They can choose to be in this relationship and they are not forced by " being caught with the hook". Fish can always escape. Every human can fall in love whether they are 10 or 100 years old but the feeling matures in us as we get older and we experience and learn more. Men are visual beings but what they see isn’t always what they get., it takes more to fall in love. That’s why it’s possible to blind man to fall in love. A true love is blind and it lasts forever. It never dies no matter how old we get.
Courtly Love
1) “First tell yourself all women can be won.” “Choose one whom you can call your only love.” Ovid’s description of love is just like a set of rules that every man has to apply in order to reach the heart of a woman. He describes a series of steps that a man has to follow if he wants to be a successful lover. On the other hand, modern love’s advisors like online Men’s Health Magazine and Relationship sites have developed new techniques more according with the necessities and circumstances of our time. For example, in Searchwarp.com we find a series of rules of how to get the girl that one like. Among those rules or principles are “Be yourself,” “Be nice,” “Be a friend,” “Clean up your act,” etc. But if a person is suffering of heartache, Ovid recommends “Avoid lonely places.” “Keep your doors open,” and “Indifference.” Modern love’s advisors like Men’s Health Magazine describe heartache as a serious problem that goes from “depression and loss of working efficiency to crime and suicide.” Among the recommendations are to give a “psychological approach” as well as some steps to follow like “remember your dignity,” Think that you get back your freedom,” “A prayer or advice from a priest would certainly help,” etc.
2) According to the Roman poet Ovid, Tiresias knew the act of love from both genre perspectives because he spent part of his life as a woman and part of his life as a man. Tiresias was a victim of an argument between Zeus and his wife Hera on the theme of “who has more pleasure in sex.” When Tiresias said that “of ten parts a man enjoys one only,” Hera turned him blind because his opinion was against Hera point of view. As a consolation Zeus gave him the gift of foresight. I agree with Tiresias that women enjoy sex more that men. A men need just 10 minutes to be satisfied and then need 10 minutes to rest to do it again ( With the exception of teenagers of course). On the other hand women are multiple orgasms; they can just relax and liberate their passion. I think that the incident with Zeus and his wife taught Tiresias be more insightful and that is why he did not want to tell the truth in “Oedipus the King.”
3) Capellanus wrote that “Love is always growing or diminishing.” I agree with he because love is like a flame that needs fuel to keep burning. That combustible are small details like put attention, respect your partner, do not forget special dates, etc. If people do those things love will be burning forever. Also, I agree that “A new love expels an old one.” However, I believe that is not just a new love but also it needs some time because time will help to heal love’s hurts. “True jealousy always increases the effect of love.” I agree with him because if people experiment true jealousy, that mean that people really love that person and as a result love will grow. “He who suffers from an excess of passion is not suited to love.” I agree because in order to keep a stable relationship a couple needs to find a balance between love and passion. On the other hand, I totally disagree with Capellanus when he mentions that after certain age men and women cannot love. I believe that love is available at any age and when I say love I also include passion because an old man or and old women can be very passionate at any age. He mentions that “blindness impedes love,” I disagree with that statement because even a blind man can have and experiment feelings. He cans use the other four senses to love and be loved.
2) According to the Roman poet Ovid, Tiresias knew the act of love from both genre perspectives because he spent part of his life as a woman and part of his life as a man. Tiresias was a victim of an argument between Zeus and his wife Hera on the theme of “who has more pleasure in sex.” When Tiresias said that “of ten parts a man enjoys one only,” Hera turned him blind because his opinion was against Hera point of view. As a consolation Zeus gave him the gift of foresight. I agree with Tiresias that women enjoy sex more that men. A men need just 10 minutes to be satisfied and then need 10 minutes to rest to do it again ( With the exception of teenagers of course). On the other hand women are multiple orgasms; they can just relax and liberate their passion. I think that the incident with Zeus and his wife taught Tiresias be more insightful and that is why he did not want to tell the truth in “Oedipus the King.”
3) Capellanus wrote that “Love is always growing or diminishing.” I agree with he because love is like a flame that needs fuel to keep burning. That combustible are small details like put attention, respect your partner, do not forget special dates, etc. If people do those things love will be burning forever. Also, I agree that “A new love expels an old one.” However, I believe that is not just a new love but also it needs some time because time will help to heal love’s hurts. “True jealousy always increases the effect of love.” I agree with him because if people experiment true jealousy, that mean that people really love that person and as a result love will grow. “He who suffers from an excess of passion is not suited to love.” I agree because in order to keep a stable relationship a couple needs to find a balance between love and passion. On the other hand, I totally disagree with Capellanus when he mentions that after certain age men and women cannot love. I believe that love is available at any age and when I say love I also include passion because an old man or and old women can be very passionate at any age. He mentions that “blindness impedes love,” I disagree with that statement because even a blind man can have and experiment feelings. He cans use the other four senses to love and be loved.
LOVE
The description given in the text by Ovid that love can be viewed as a “hook”. Its purpose it to capture someone else’s emotions and eventually make them fall in love with you. Ovid’s description of love is clearly from a man’s point of view and tends to be selfish. Since he says that is a man who “chooses” the woman he wants and would try to make her fall in love with him. In the text, love is also described as blind; even the person with the most obscure personality will be seen as perfect by his or her lover. Ovid’s description of “how to cure” oneself from heartache is not to be alone and look and for company at all times. These guidelines of how to cure oneself from heartache are shared too on popular magazines such as CARAS (Faces; a Spanish magazine) and Men’s Health Magazine. In CARAS magazine they stated that after a breakup “time is your best friend” and to let “time do his work”. Meaning that after a breakup we shouldn’t feel anxious about trying to forget that person, time itself will make us heal and forget such tragic moments. Men’s Health Magazine gives the same advice in how to cure a heartache as Ovid did; only in a modern way: Maybe you think of yourself as the lone wolf, and that's cool, but a breakup buddy helps. Especially a hot breakup buddy. Enlist a female friend or three.
Tiresias punishment was to live as a woman for several years of his life. This punishment gave him the opportunity to experience love both ways, as a man and also a woman. He probably has a better understanding of what love is since he has experienced love as a girl and also a man. I think his determination that women enjoy sex more than men is due to his punishment, having the opportunity to be a woman and a man. Tiresias must know what he’s talking about.
In my opinion I think it’s silly to have rules for love. Love is such complex emotion that sometimes is stressful in trying to define it or describe it. I think love manifests different to everyone in this world. I do agree on the rule that states that exaggerated jealousy is very harmful to a relationship which causes stress, anxiety and love to diminish. My opinion on this topic is not very strong, because like I have said love is way too complicated to try to characterize it, it depends on the couple and how they work it out.
Tiresias punishment was to live as a woman for several years of his life. This punishment gave him the opportunity to experience love both ways, as a man and also a woman. He probably has a better understanding of what love is since he has experienced love as a girl and also a man. I think his determination that women enjoy sex more than men is due to his punishment, having the opportunity to be a woman and a man. Tiresias must know what he’s talking about.
In my opinion I think it’s silly to have rules for love. Love is such complex emotion that sometimes is stressful in trying to define it or describe it. I think love manifests different to everyone in this world. I do agree on the rule that states that exaggerated jealousy is very harmful to a relationship which causes stress, anxiety and love to diminish. My opinion on this topic is not very strong, because like I have said love is way too complicated to try to characterize it, it depends on the couple and how they work it out.
Courtly Love
Ovid described the love long time ago when society had different values and standards. People were getting married based on their royal title and position in society. For that reason, the first rule of love is “Marriage is no excuse for not loving”. The royal people had lovers all of the time, and the poems were written for them. However, the cause of marriage is love. Single people are going out every weekend trying to find love. I found lots of pieces in several magazines with tips on “How to find the love of your life” and “Where you can meet the right person”. The heartache healing process remains the same. “You have to forgive to forget, and forget, to feel again.” (http://ezinearticles.com/broken-heart-&id111254). “Remind yourself of the love you feel for each other, and show it. There’s no law against being sweet even if you’ve been married for some years. And if you’re having a hard time, clear your mind, and remember why in the first place you got married.”(http://www.loveletterbox.com/love_advice.htm)
Tiresias has lived both as a man and as a female prostitute. According to the myth he came upon two copulating snakes and killed the female. At the same moment he killed her, he turned into woman. In seven years on the same road he saw the same snakes. This time he killed male and then he turned into a man. Since he had a great sexual experience of both, male and female, he was judging the disagreement between Hera and Zeus. Hera said men enjoy sex more, while Zeus declared the opposite. "Of ten parts a man enjoys one only."- Tiresias replied. Hera was so angry that she blinded Tiresias. Zeus could not help it, so he gave him the ability to see the future and extended his life for seven generations.
In the “Oedipus the King” he did not want to tell the truth in the beginning, because he knew that gods might punish him for that.
Looking at Capellanus’ text I want to say that it is impossible to make rules for love because we are all different and we all have our own experiences. Some relationships are very dramatic, but it makes it work, some relationships are very calm and stable. For example rules # 3, 21 and 22. There are different degrees of jealousy and it is hard to say whether it increases the effects of love or not. However, I believe that it’s normal to have a small amount of jealousy in relationships. I also believe in the quote “Love is always growing or diminishing”. Unfortunately it doesn’t always work this way and we see very often that people are getting divorced a couple of years after marriage.
Tiresias has lived both as a man and as a female prostitute. According to the myth he came upon two copulating snakes and killed the female. At the same moment he killed her, he turned into woman. In seven years on the same road he saw the same snakes. This time he killed male and then he turned into a man. Since he had a great sexual experience of both, male and female, he was judging the disagreement between Hera and Zeus. Hera said men enjoy sex more, while Zeus declared the opposite. "Of ten parts a man enjoys one only."- Tiresias replied. Hera was so angry that she blinded Tiresias. Zeus could not help it, so he gave him the ability to see the future and extended his life for seven generations.
In the “Oedipus the King” he did not want to tell the truth in the beginning, because he knew that gods might punish him for that.
Looking at Capellanus’ text I want to say that it is impossible to make rules for love because we are all different and we all have our own experiences. Some relationships are very dramatic, but it makes it work, some relationships are very calm and stable. For example rules # 3, 21 and 22. There are different degrees of jealousy and it is hard to say whether it increases the effects of love or not. However, I believe that it’s normal to have a small amount of jealousy in relationships. I also believe in the quote “Love is always growing or diminishing”. Unfortunately it doesn’t always work this way and we see very often that people are getting divorced a couple of years after marriage.
love
1. I like Ovid’s description of love. He talks about how to enamor women and what tricks to use. “Use language plain and speech of common folk from a gentleman she shrinks, into same…..tears are helpful too, tears will melt a stone...” He also says that “all women can be won” which means that if men really want, he can get women’s love but he has to show that he cares. I think that both sides have to care because if only one part love and care, that person will always get hurt. He also mentioned that we should think about “ex” in a negative way: “those legs, how ugly; those arms are not pretty that bad way out is for brutes. How short she is! How demanding!” I would not say it is the best idea; therefore I disagree with his statement. How you can talk like that about person that you loved, you shared everything with her/him! I think the best way to forget about your former love is to destroy everything that reminds you of him/her and avoid that person. I did some research on Cosmopolitan.com and there are few articles that talk about this problem. Most of them say that the time is the best medicine for heartache. I agree with this statement and I believe it is one of the best things to do, just give it some time and do whatever makes you happy.
2. Tiresias is a blind seer who appears in many legends. He was he only person to have lived both as male and female. One day Hera argued with her husband Zeus about who has more pleasure in sex, women or men. According to her men enjoy sex more then women but her husband believed that women enjoy sex more. To solve this problem they called Tiresias, who has experience both. Tiresias, who has experience both stated that women enjoy sex more then men “of ten parts a men enjoys only one but a women enjoys the full ten parts in her heart”. This answer made Hera very upset and she blinded him. Zeus could not do anything to stop her but he recompensed him with long life and a power of a seer. I think Hera’s punishment was improper to the whole situation. Tiresias did not do anything wrong. He just told her the truth but she did not like that and could not accept it because it was Tiresias word against her. It was a good life lesson for Tiresias and in “Oedipus the King” he refused to tell the truth about Oedipus’ past. He just wanted the truth to come up naturally. As to my opinion who enjoy sex more women or men, I can only speak for the first part and say that “of ten parts a women enjoy the full ten parts”:))
3. Andreas Capellanus was the XII century author of “De Amore” (The art of Courtly Love). According to him “love is inborn suffering proceeding from the sight and immoderate thought upon the beauty of the other sex”. To me, love is something very difficult to describe. It is a number of feelings and experience that can be amazing or can really hurt people. I believe there is no person in the world that does not love somebody or something. Each person is different; therefore people show love in different ways. Some people give to the love person gifts and expect to get something in return and that is how they express their feelings. While other people are very romantic, they cannot live without love ones; therefore they spend with them entire time. For me, to show somebody that you have love is to show how much you really care. It is important not to be ashamed of the other and do not try to change the other person. Love him/her for who he/she is and accept him/her as he/she is!
Andreas Capellanus give us number of rules of love. I agree with some of them. For example, rule # 11 “It is not proper to love one whom one would be ashamed to marry”. In my opinion if a person is ashamed to marry somebody that he/she loves there is no love. That person lives in dissimulation and will never be happy and later or sooner both of them will get hurt. Rule # 5 “It is not good for one lover to take anything against the will of the other”. I believe that when two people love each other, they shall not do things that might hurt one of them. They have to build their relationship, do everything to be happy; they have to respect each other’s feelings and emotions. There are also some rules that I strongly disagree with. For instance, rule # 4 & 21 which talks about jealousy. I think jealous is the worst thing that can appear in relationship. When there is love there is no place for jealous. Jealous can ruin even the best relationship. These people who say that truly love, should trust the other person, they should spend time together and apart as well because every person needs time on his/her own. Therefore, I totally agree with Diana Kirschner, Ph.D who is a dating expert and said taht: “Jealousy is a form of negative self-talk which researches shows can cause anxiety and depression. We all know it can lead to painful heartbreak, scads of worry, out-of-control outbursts, and setbacks in relationship. It can even destroy love”.
2. Tiresias is a blind seer who appears in many legends. He was he only person to have lived both as male and female. One day Hera argued with her husband Zeus about who has more pleasure in sex, women or men. According to her men enjoy sex more then women but her husband believed that women enjoy sex more. To solve this problem they called Tiresias, who has experience both. Tiresias, who has experience both stated that women enjoy sex more then men “of ten parts a men enjoys only one but a women enjoys the full ten parts in her heart”. This answer made Hera very upset and she blinded him. Zeus could not do anything to stop her but he recompensed him with long life and a power of a seer. I think Hera’s punishment was improper to the whole situation. Tiresias did not do anything wrong. He just told her the truth but she did not like that and could not accept it because it was Tiresias word against her. It was a good life lesson for Tiresias and in “Oedipus the King” he refused to tell the truth about Oedipus’ past. He just wanted the truth to come up naturally. As to my opinion who enjoy sex more women or men, I can only speak for the first part and say that “of ten parts a women enjoy the full ten parts”:))
3. Andreas Capellanus was the XII century author of “De Amore” (The art of Courtly Love). According to him “love is inborn suffering proceeding from the sight and immoderate thought upon the beauty of the other sex”. To me, love is something very difficult to describe. It is a number of feelings and experience that can be amazing or can really hurt people. I believe there is no person in the world that does not love somebody or something. Each person is different; therefore people show love in different ways. Some people give to the love person gifts and expect to get something in return and that is how they express their feelings. While other people are very romantic, they cannot live without love ones; therefore they spend with them entire time. For me, to show somebody that you have love is to show how much you really care. It is important not to be ashamed of the other and do not try to change the other person. Love him/her for who he/she is and accept him/her as he/she is!
Andreas Capellanus give us number of rules of love. I agree with some of them. For example, rule # 11 “It is not proper to love one whom one would be ashamed to marry”. In my opinion if a person is ashamed to marry somebody that he/she loves there is no love. That person lives in dissimulation and will never be happy and later or sooner both of them will get hurt. Rule # 5 “It is not good for one lover to take anything against the will of the other”. I believe that when two people love each other, they shall not do things that might hurt one of them. They have to build their relationship, do everything to be happy; they have to respect each other’s feelings and emotions. There are also some rules that I strongly disagree with. For instance, rule # 4 & 21 which talks about jealousy. I think jealous is the worst thing that can appear in relationship. When there is love there is no place for jealous. Jealous can ruin even the best relationship. These people who say that truly love, should trust the other person, they should spend time together and apart as well because every person needs time on his/her own. Therefore, I totally agree with Diana Kirschner, Ph.D who is a dating expert and said taht: “Jealousy is a form of negative self-talk which researches shows can cause anxiety and depression. We all know it can lead to painful heartbreak, scads of worry, out-of-control outbursts, and setbacks in relationship. It can even destroy love”.
Courtly Love
1) Ovid describes love as one of the most natural things that humans can endure. He states that it is a road of emotions with many ups and downs but thats how it was made to be. The most interesting part about Ovid's viewpiont on love is when he says "Think not she'll drop before you from the skies". This basically means that it is not likely that you will find love if you sit back and wait or try to let it come to you, it is out there and you have to go get it. Many magazines differ saying that love will come to those who are not in search of it. In a foxnews report on love researchers have defined the chemistry one feels when in love as "the effects of brain chemicals triggering differet reactions". This shows individual just how natural the physical attraction is. The way to get over love by Ovid is to get over the sorrow. Stop the moaning and crying try to be around fun, loving people or friends as much as possible so you dont have the time to think about your ex. He also says not to turn that previous love into hate because it is unhealthy and will haunt you. Compared to Cosmo tips of how to handle a break it is very similar. It suggest doing your favorite activities with family and friends. Keep positive energy and avoid sad love movies.
2) Tiresias is a decendent of Udaeus who as a young man was watching two snakes one male and one female engaging in sexual intercourse. Tiresias decided to wound the female snake. Disguisted by his actions the Gods turned Tiresias into a woman. After living several years as a woman he embarked on those same snakes and wounded the man this time. Tiresias was then turned into a man again. When Hera and Zeus disputed over who enjoyed sex more than asked Tiresias being that he experieced living as both a man and woman. Tiresias replied that if love was divided by 10 , 9 would go to women and 1 would go to men. Hera was extremely unsatisfied that he agreed with Zeus therefore she struck him blind. Zeus however gave him the power of insight, seeing things before they actually happen. In my opinion it seems as thoug woman and men enjoy sex equally. I dont think that woman enjoy sex 9 times as much as men but I do believe that most woman use their heart more than me when egaging in sexual intercourse.
3) Capellanus set of rules on love are way to precise. I dont believe that there are specific times or ways to deals with love. There are no time frames for dealing with the lose of a love one or an age at which you can fall in love. I don't think that an man has to be jealous to be love in love especially if he is confident and trustful of his partner. I believe that most of his rules were a tad bit extreme however, lovers do find theirselves agreeing to the most part of the rules without actually knowing it. In many cases one's actions is decided by what their lover will think or make out of it becasue you generally want to see your lover happy. Jealousy and suspicion are emotions that can possibly arise during a relationship but everyone does'nt interpret these feelings the same. I strongly believe that their are no rules to love unless your talking about an age difference or being in love with a child. Some of the rules listed are things that common people have experience or believe about their loved ones, it is not say that if you don't abide by those rules that you will not love.
2) Tiresias is a decendent of Udaeus who as a young man was watching two snakes one male and one female engaging in sexual intercourse. Tiresias decided to wound the female snake. Disguisted by his actions the Gods turned Tiresias into a woman. After living several years as a woman he embarked on those same snakes and wounded the man this time. Tiresias was then turned into a man again. When Hera and Zeus disputed over who enjoyed sex more than asked Tiresias being that he experieced living as both a man and woman. Tiresias replied that if love was divided by 10 , 9 would go to women and 1 would go to men. Hera was extremely unsatisfied that he agreed with Zeus therefore she struck him blind. Zeus however gave him the power of insight, seeing things before they actually happen. In my opinion it seems as thoug woman and men enjoy sex equally. I dont think that woman enjoy sex 9 times as much as men but I do believe that most woman use their heart more than me when egaging in sexual intercourse.
3) Capellanus set of rules on love are way to precise. I dont believe that there are specific times or ways to deals with love. There are no time frames for dealing with the lose of a love one or an age at which you can fall in love. I don't think that an man has to be jealous to be love in love especially if he is confident and trustful of his partner. I believe that most of his rules were a tad bit extreme however, lovers do find theirselves agreeing to the most part of the rules without actually knowing it. In many cases one's actions is decided by what their lover will think or make out of it becasue you generally want to see your lover happy. Jealousy and suspicion are emotions that can possibly arise during a relationship but everyone does'nt interpret these feelings the same. I strongly believe that their are no rules to love unless your talking about an age difference or being in love with a child. Some of the rules listed are things that common people have experience or believe about their loved ones, it is not say that if you don't abide by those rules that you will not love.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
courtly love
Ovid describes love as a form of art where men are trying to win over the heart of women. He explains that love is present when there are other emotions present alongside such as laughter and sorrow. All relationships go through a cycle of emotions but it is healthy. He goes on to telling us how to act around women and how your appearance should be. For example, Ovid says to "have expert hands trim hair and beard" which emphasizes the need for good hygiene. He also mentions to maintain clean lips along with fresh breath. Similarly, in Men's Health Magazine, there is an article that informs men how to shave properly to get a smooth gentle surface for the women. The article suggests that "if you wear fragrance, use an unscented shave cream. You don't want her nose sniffing a mixed message" http://www.menshealth.com/spotlight/skin/close_shave.html
Ovid's idea of 'cures' tells us to take advantage of your woman's unattractive attributes to make them feel comfortable about themselves. An example would be to tell her to sing a lot if her voice doesn't sound too pleasant but be sure to compliment her so that she feels more secure about herself. In an Article found on Askmen.com, it says that "compliments are key to marital success". http://www.askmen.com/dating/doclove_400/451_relationship_expert.html
This relates to Ovid's ideas as marriage is a relationship of built from love.
According to Greek mythology, Tiresias was a blind prophet of Thebes, who lived life with experience as both a male and female. He was transformed into a female for 7 years. The story of how he became a blind prophet is that Hera and Zeus had an argument of which gender has more pressure from having sex so they decided to ask Tiresias since he had experience from both ends of the spectrum. Tiresias replied that women have more pressure having sex. Hera was angered and blinded Tiresias but Zeus also gave him the power to tell prophecies. In Oedipus the King, we see that Tiresias is reluctant to tell Oedipus the truth because he knows the Gods are watching and may have dire consequences. His past experience made him think about what comes out from his mouth. Eventually, the truth came out and Jocasta ended up killing herself and Oedipus blinded himself.
Capellanus has a very precise set of rules for love which I don't entirely agree on. Some points are agreeable but some are just absurd. For example, I don't agree on the fact that there is certain age you have to be to have "true love". Although there are sexual limitations, it doesn't mean that feelings aren't there. Another point I disagree on is "love rarely lasts when it is revealed". Perfect example is a wedding. Weddings occur to reveal to everyone that a couple is in love and want to spend the rest of their life with each other. There are also valid points that Capellanus include such as "when a lover suddenly has sight of his beloved, his heart beats wildly". This often happens when you really like someone and it shows that you want to be with them. There are little to none pure emotions when one is searching for a relationship for the purpose of sexual desire.
Ovid's idea of 'cures' tells us to take advantage of your woman's unattractive attributes to make them feel comfortable about themselves. An example would be to tell her to sing a lot if her voice doesn't sound too pleasant but be sure to compliment her so that she feels more secure about herself. In an Article found on Askmen.com, it says that "compliments are key to marital success". http://www.askmen.com/dating/doclove_400/451_relationship_expert.html
This relates to Ovid's ideas as marriage is a relationship of built from love.
According to Greek mythology, Tiresias was a blind prophet of Thebes, who lived life with experience as both a male and female. He was transformed into a female for 7 years. The story of how he became a blind prophet is that Hera and Zeus had an argument of which gender has more pressure from having sex so they decided to ask Tiresias since he had experience from both ends of the spectrum. Tiresias replied that women have more pressure having sex. Hera was angered and blinded Tiresias but Zeus also gave him the power to tell prophecies. In Oedipus the King, we see that Tiresias is reluctant to tell Oedipus the truth because he knows the Gods are watching and may have dire consequences. His past experience made him think about what comes out from his mouth. Eventually, the truth came out and Jocasta ended up killing herself and Oedipus blinded himself.
Capellanus has a very precise set of rules for love which I don't entirely agree on. Some points are agreeable but some are just absurd. For example, I don't agree on the fact that there is certain age you have to be to have "true love". Although there are sexual limitations, it doesn't mean that feelings aren't there. Another point I disagree on is "love rarely lasts when it is revealed". Perfect example is a wedding. Weddings occur to reveal to everyone that a couple is in love and want to spend the rest of their life with each other. There are also valid points that Capellanus include such as "when a lover suddenly has sight of his beloved, his heart beats wildly". This often happens when you really like someone and it shows that you want to be with them. There are little to none pure emotions when one is searching for a relationship for the purpose of sexual desire.
Laura's Courtly Love
1) Ovid mentions that a man should give the way to the woman and according to the Men'sHealth.com, saying things that are smooth to her ears is a definate way to avoid a dating pitfall. In one part of a article found on Men'sHealth.com, it states the reaction a man should respond to the woman in the relationship as the following,"Strike the perfect balance. Tell her, "Nothing is a turnoff—I'm interested in all of you," says Sharyn Wolf" I think that this may not always be true because this can only cause a relationship to increase in misunderstanding because the man will be holding his feelings behind while the woman is cluelessly accepting the wrong perspective of the type or partner she is with. In fact, I feel that overtime this can cause the relationship to end in a very confused state.
2) Tiresias is a man with the experience of a woman because he was turned into a woman for a period of time due to the fact that he had killed the female of two mating snakes causing the male snake to die as well; And because Tiresias has experiences being both genders, during an argument that Hera and Zeus were having about which gender received more pleasure from sex, Tiresias was called for suggestions. Tiresias had suggested that woman enjoyed sex more then men, and because of the fact that Zeus was living in an open relationship (sleeping around), Hera angrily disagreed and blinded Tiresias. I feel that this event has caused Tiresias to be more insightful of his actions because now he acknowledges the consequences of his actions.
3) Capellanus' description of love involves a lot about jealous, loyalty, and the unstable depth of love. Capellanus most likely views love as a fairy tale. One example includes with Capellanus mentions that the more jealous that an individual feels the depth of love will increase, which in many cases may not always be true because sometimes jealousy can actually break relationships apart. Another example may include when Capellanus mentions that when love fades away, that it will never come back, which is false because many times when love does fade away, due to an event or reminiscing, the love can return. This is why in many relationships one couple is always furious when the other partner is “hanging out” with an ex.
2) Tiresias is a man with the experience of a woman because he was turned into a woman for a period of time due to the fact that he had killed the female of two mating snakes causing the male snake to die as well; And because Tiresias has experiences being both genders, during an argument that Hera and Zeus were having about which gender received more pleasure from sex, Tiresias was called for suggestions. Tiresias had suggested that woman enjoyed sex more then men, and because of the fact that Zeus was living in an open relationship (sleeping around), Hera angrily disagreed and blinded Tiresias. I feel that this event has caused Tiresias to be more insightful of his actions because now he acknowledges the consequences of his actions.
3) Capellanus' description of love involves a lot about jealous, loyalty, and the unstable depth of love. Capellanus most likely views love as a fairy tale. One example includes with Capellanus mentions that the more jealous that an individual feels the depth of love will increase, which in many cases may not always be true because sometimes jealousy can actually break relationships apart. Another example may include when Capellanus mentions that when love fades away, that it will never come back, which is false because many times when love does fade away, due to an event or reminiscing, the love can return. This is why in many relationships one couple is always furious when the other partner is “hanging out” with an ex.
Courtly Love
1) Ovid’s describes of love as a “hook” which means the capturing of one man’s desires, therefore love is blind. You cannot control love, it just happens naturally. But usually a man is the one trying to win a women’s heart and that is how love starts. Ovid’s way of curing oneself from heartbreak is not to be alone because it is more harmful but if one was in a crowd then it is safer. Cosmogirl has similar advice, “Force yourself to get out of bed, to wear normal clothes, to drink tons of ice water, to go out with friends even when it's the last thing you want to do.” If one’s alone then they will surely think about their ex but if he is surrounded by friends and doing something productive then he will not be thinking about the breakup. Ovid also states that within time slowly but surely she will begin to fade away. Kidshealth.org has stated that “Give yourself time,” the pain doesn’t go away that instant but within time you will feel like yourself again. All three sources agree that crying is a good way to let everything all out and you will feel better afterwards.
2) Tiresias was originally a man turned into a woman for seven years. One day Hera and Zeus had an argument about who was more pleasure in sex , Hera had claimed the man and Zeus said the women. Since Tiresias had experiences with being both man and women, he revealed that “Of ten parts a man enjoys one only.” So Hera struck him blind and Zeus gave him a gift of prophecy since he couldn’t undo what Hera did. This made Tiresias be more insightful because he thinks before he speaks now. In the story Oedipus the King, Tiresias did not want to tell what was to happen with Oedipus in the future. He knew that there was a consequence if he didn’t tell and was more afraid of what the gods will do if he didn’t tell Oedipus his prophecy. I think Tiresias determination in women having more pleasure in sex then men does is because even though Oedipus’s mother/wife was old, she still was able to conceive children with Oedipus and probably took great pleasure in doing so.
3) Capellanus has a set of rules for love but I don’t agree with some of them. For instance, “It is not proper to love one whom one would be ashamed to marry.” Some people think marriage is just a title and don’t think it’s necessary to marry just to prove their love. I also don’t agree with “a male cannot love until he has fully reached puberty,” why does one have to fully reach puberty to be able to love? I think love just happens, no one can control it. I do agree with some things like “love is always growing and diminishing,” I think love is uncontrollable, it can always grow but it can always fade also, it just happens. I also agree with “when a lover suddenly has sight of his beloved, his heart beats wildly,” when I see my other half my heart beats rapidly and I feel butterflies in my stomach. I don’t agree that a person has to be jealous to be in love; I think overcoming the jealousy and being able to trust a person shows how much you love them.
Courtly Love
1. Ovid's description of love encompassed a man doing many things to win the woman that he loves. From good grooming habits, to becoming friends with her friend, to remembering her birthday, he almost left no stone unturned. In some ways it's good, but love is something that has to happen naturally and over a period of time, so pushing so many things to make it happen may not be a good idea. I found an interesting quote "Romance is great as long as it leads you to a real person rather than a fantasy. Many people construct an ideal mate that is impossible to find." (http://health.yahoo.com/experts/theprinciples/10486/find-your-one-true-love/) That is very true. Some people have their idea of the type of person that they want to fall in love with by making a list of what a person should and shouldn't be. That is very limiting because you will not find a person that has every trait that you want. As far as heartbreak Ovid says "Keep thinking what your wicked girl's been doing; you have no need of privacy, if you're alone. Before your eyes set every loss you've had". I saw a quote on Cosmopolitan's website that states "The best revenge is getting on with your life and living it to the fullest. You're doing it for you, not somebody else." (http://cosmopolitan.com/celebrities/exclusive/How-to-Get-Over-Him-The-No-BS-Guide-6). Even though you are dealing with heartache, its best that you move on with your life and not dwell so much on what was or what could have been. You were living your life for yourself before that person came along and that's what you should be doing once that person is no longer in your life.
2.I think that Tiresias being able to live as both a man and a woman gave him the opportunity to experience love from both perspectives and have a better understanding about females emotions in relationships. Having lived the greater majority of his life as a man, he probably had preconceived ideas and notions about women in relationships and him being forced to live as a woman and experience love as a woman may have altered some of those ideas that he previously had. His statement that women enjoy sex more than men probably stems from his own personal experience and isn’t necessarily true in all cases. I think that his punishment for making that statement was harsh, but I feel that it may have caused him to think first before speaking – which was exhibited in the story of Oedipus. He didn’t come out and say “You killed your father and now you’re to your mother”. You could tell he was trying to think of the words to use and how to say it. Eventually he did speak the truth and yet again his words had dire consequences.
3. I think that everyone has his/her own opinion about love and it’s shaped by experiences and what is seen in other relationships. I think that Cappellanus gets a little too specific regarding some of his thoughts on love (i.e. love over 60) and that’s where I disagree with him. I think love means different things to different people and that as long as a couple understands each other’s stance in their relationship and go into it with both eyes open, then they should not be criticized. Cappellanus has some ideas about relationships that I do agree with. #9 “No one can love who is not driven to do so” is very true. You cannot force someone to love or be in love with you – if it’s supposed to happen, then it will happen, but trying to push something that may not be there is a setup for disaster. I don’t agree when he says “Blindness impedes love, for a blind man cannot see that on which his mind can reflect immoderately.” What a blind person cannot see can be "viewed" in his mind. He can use his hands to touch his lover’s face to know what she looks like, to know when she’s happy or when she’s sad. To say that blindness doesn’t allow for love in insensitive.
2.I think that Tiresias being able to live as both a man and a woman gave him the opportunity to experience love from both perspectives and have a better understanding about females emotions in relationships. Having lived the greater majority of his life as a man, he probably had preconceived ideas and notions about women in relationships and him being forced to live as a woman and experience love as a woman may have altered some of those ideas that he previously had. His statement that women enjoy sex more than men probably stems from his own personal experience and isn’t necessarily true in all cases. I think that his punishment for making that statement was harsh, but I feel that it may have caused him to think first before speaking – which was exhibited in the story of Oedipus. He didn’t come out and say “You killed your father and now you’re to your mother”. You could tell he was trying to think of the words to use and how to say it. Eventually he did speak the truth and yet again his words had dire consequences.
3. I think that everyone has his/her own opinion about love and it’s shaped by experiences and what is seen in other relationships. I think that Cappellanus gets a little too specific regarding some of his thoughts on love (i.e. love over 60) and that’s where I disagree with him. I think love means different things to different people and that as long as a couple understands each other’s stance in their relationship and go into it with both eyes open, then they should not be criticized. Cappellanus has some ideas about relationships that I do agree with. #9 “No one can love who is not driven to do so” is very true. You cannot force someone to love or be in love with you – if it’s supposed to happen, then it will happen, but trying to push something that may not be there is a setup for disaster. I don’t agree when he says “Blindness impedes love, for a blind man cannot see that on which his mind can reflect immoderately.” What a blind person cannot see can be "viewed" in his mind. He can use his hands to touch his lover’s face to know what she looks like, to know when she’s happy or when she’s sad. To say that blindness doesn’t allow for love in insensitive.
Courtly Love
Ovid describes love as a ‘hook’ in that once a man has fallen in love he will do whatever necessary to ascertain his desire. He details certain stipulations and restraints that can prevent one from truly being ‘in love’ and is careful to detail the difference between passion and love. After explaining what he considers to be the requirements of love he then proceeds to give advice to those suffering from a broken heart. He warns one to avoid “lonely places”. He also advises that one not think about what their former lover is doing for it will leave a man embittered and hateful. He warns against ending love by hating the other rather, he advises indifference so that one can move on.
Many of Ovid’s suggestions are very similar to those found on modern day relationship sites. Cosmo.com for example advises, “Hide all pictures of your ex so you won’t be constantly reminded of him on a daily basis”. This is similar to Ovid’s advice to not think about one’s ex. Glamour.com suggests, “Don’t sit at home and wallow in self-pity. Go out with friends, get a hobby, learn something new!” This echo’s Ovid’s advice to avoid lonely places. Both agree that sitting at home thinking about what one has lost will only make things worse and not help to get over a broken heart.
Tiresias was a blind Theban seer who it was told was once turned into a woman for killing the female of two mating snakes. After he killed the male snake he was turned back into a man however, his time spent as a woman led him to the conclusion that women enjoy sex more than men. As punishment for this statement Hera blinded him, leaving Zeus to compensate by giving him the gift of prophecy. After being given this gift Tiresias was often referred to in other Greek mythological stories as a prophesier of what was to come. His determination is interesting as, according to the legend, he spent seven years of his life as a female and the rest as a male. I think it’s more subjective and too big of a generalization to claim that one gender enjoys sex more than the other.
I agree with much of what Capellanus states about love, including the differentiation between passion and love. I also agree with his point that “the true lover never desires the embrace of any save his lover”. I think that if a person is truly in love, then as Capellanus states that person will have no desire or need for any other lovers in their life. I do not however, agree with Capellanus’ stipulations about the proper ages for falling in love. While, I do not necessarily think that a 12 year old girl can truly fall in love, I do believe that a 60 year old man can. I also think that love is not something which one can put restrictions upon. It is naïve to state that all persons between these ages in these circumstances will fall in love. It is too transitory of an emotion to attempt to define in such limited terms.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Rules of love
1, In Ovid’s Ars Amoratia, when a man falls in love with someone, he does whatever his beloved wishes. If he can get her love, he would fight at an arena. In the story, men mostly fall in love for women. Men use all kinds of tricks to get women’s love. However, in the real world, men and women are both equally attracted to each other. Both men and women often have a hard time to get their soul mates. According to an article “What makes Men Fall in Love” most of men put their first priority to their friendships. Love is supposed to be suited for someone who is immersed in something else rather than love. “The passion she shows for something else confirms her inherent goodness, her personal drive, her independence. All pluses in the woman we're hoping to spend a few decades with.” (David Zinczenko) http://health.yahoo.com/experts/menlovesex/24834/what-makes-men-fall-in-love/
When a person loves someone, he must experience a heartache which makes him feel sick, sad, and lonely. One of the reasons why falling love causes him to have a heartache is because he has not a small expectation for his lover. For example, when he falls in someone, he wants her to love him. Then if she does not, he feels sad and lonely. This refusal gets him depressed. While he gets depressed, it is so hard for him to think that this occasion would be the best for him to improve himself. “Denial or Suppression of those bad feelings (i.e., confusion, sadness, anger, etc.) will only plant them deeper into your soul where they grow and eventually overtake all the good in your life. Your present moment is where your power resides; the power to heal past hurts, and the power to lay the groundwork for a better tomorrow for you and your loved ones”. (Carl Pntejo) http://www.amazines.com/article_detail.cfm/568403?articleid=568403
2, First transformation from a man to woman occured when Tiresias hit two snakes with his tick during they were having intercourse. As a punishment of disturbing their love for nothing, he was transformed into a woman. After he lived seven years as a woman, she again saw two snakes having intercourse. She hit them with his stick and then, she became a man once again. When Hera and Zeus were having an argument about which female or male have more pressure from intercourse, Tiresias was called and asked for an answer it. Because of his experiment of being both male and female, there would be no one else who is able to give them an appropriate answer. Tiresias answered that female have more pressure than male do. This answer made Hera upset, therefore Hera struck him blind. Zeus gave him the gift of prophecy in return for being Zeus’ side. http://www.geocities.com/chadofborg/tiresias.html
The decision Tiresias made was proven in Oedipus the King. Because in Oedipus the King, Oedipus got married with his mother Jocasta, which means there is definitely a big age difference between them. Although they had such a difference, they had four children. This means that Jocasta did not refuse to have intercourse with Oedipus. It is hard for a woman to have intercourse with a man during a long term relationship without any pressure.
3, Basically the text explain that love is uncontrolled feeling towards the beauty of the other sex. Also it has certain regulation of love. For example, male has to be mature to love someone, if he is ashamed to marry he is supposed to love no one, and jealousy sometimes makes love deeper. However the text does not fit into the real world. First of all, Capellanus argues the love exists between male and female, but there are a lot of people fall in love with the same sex. He may say homosexuality is not a true love, but there is nothing wrong with homosexuality. Even though it is hard for some people to understand homosexuality it is still a true love and it is beautiful. Second of all, it does not matter how old a man is, he is still able to love someone. If he is too young, it looks pretty childish to adults, but as long as he is serious, it is a true love. Third of all, the marriage and love should be considered as separate. Although, a lot of men are not ready for marriage, they still seriously love someone. When people get married, of course they have to love each other, however, the marriage can not be formed by just love. Finally, Capellanus’ rules of love have clear explanation of what love is. When man is seriously in love with someone, it is hard to sleep and eat. Being loved should not be limited. Loving someone gives a man both pressure and depression, but without love, he would not be able to have a fulfilling life.
When a person loves someone, he must experience a heartache which makes him feel sick, sad, and lonely. One of the reasons why falling love causes him to have a heartache is because he has not a small expectation for his lover. For example, when he falls in someone, he wants her to love him. Then if she does not, he feels sad and lonely. This refusal gets him depressed. While he gets depressed, it is so hard for him to think that this occasion would be the best for him to improve himself. “Denial or Suppression of those bad feelings (i.e., confusion, sadness, anger, etc.) will only plant them deeper into your soul where they grow and eventually overtake all the good in your life. Your present moment is where your power resides; the power to heal past hurts, and the power to lay the groundwork for a better tomorrow for you and your loved ones”. (Carl Pntejo) http://www.amazines.com/article_detail.cfm/568403?articleid=568403
2, First transformation from a man to woman occured when Tiresias hit two snakes with his tick during they were having intercourse. As a punishment of disturbing their love for nothing, he was transformed into a woman. After he lived seven years as a woman, she again saw two snakes having intercourse. She hit them with his stick and then, she became a man once again. When Hera and Zeus were having an argument about which female or male have more pressure from intercourse, Tiresias was called and asked for an answer it. Because of his experiment of being both male and female, there would be no one else who is able to give them an appropriate answer. Tiresias answered that female have more pressure than male do. This answer made Hera upset, therefore Hera struck him blind. Zeus gave him the gift of prophecy in return for being Zeus’ side. http://www.geocities.com/chadofborg/tiresias.html
The decision Tiresias made was proven in Oedipus the King. Because in Oedipus the King, Oedipus got married with his mother Jocasta, which means there is definitely a big age difference between them. Although they had such a difference, they had four children. This means that Jocasta did not refuse to have intercourse with Oedipus. It is hard for a woman to have intercourse with a man during a long term relationship without any pressure.
3, Basically the text explain that love is uncontrolled feeling towards the beauty of the other sex. Also it has certain regulation of love. For example, male has to be mature to love someone, if he is ashamed to marry he is supposed to love no one, and jealousy sometimes makes love deeper. However the text does not fit into the real world. First of all, Capellanus argues the love exists between male and female, but there are a lot of people fall in love with the same sex. He may say homosexuality is not a true love, but there is nothing wrong with homosexuality. Even though it is hard for some people to understand homosexuality it is still a true love and it is beautiful. Second of all, it does not matter how old a man is, he is still able to love someone. If he is too young, it looks pretty childish to adults, but as long as he is serious, it is a true love. Third of all, the marriage and love should be considered as separate. Although, a lot of men are not ready for marriage, they still seriously love someone. When people get married, of course they have to love each other, however, the marriage can not be formed by just love. Finally, Capellanus’ rules of love have clear explanation of what love is. When man is seriously in love with someone, it is hard to sleep and eat. Being loved should not be limited. Loving someone gives a man both pressure and depression, but without love, he would not be able to have a fulfilling life.
Courtly Love
1. Ovid’s description of the “cure” for love is very simple. He suggests a man should go out and try to look past the flaws and make the woman feel comfortable. Once that happens, love can blossom and it can be done without being shallow. Also, Ovid mentions that lovers should avoid lonely places. “You who find it hard to unlearn your loving avoid lonely places lovers.” This was particularly interesting to me because a lot of relationship magazines suggest the best place to find love is to go out to places such as bars, clubs, or other social events. While looking through Menshealth.com, I came across an article that stated, “If you're always sweating over what to say to a woman, stop. Turns out what you say may not be as important as how you say it. As long as you're flirtatious -- smiling, nodding, raising your eyebrows -- you stand a good chance of coming across as attractive to women, according to a new study from the University of Bristol in the U.K.” The main point of this article is to engage the woman and make the “first move”. This is similar to Ovid’s article since it suggests that the man should approach the woman he desires. On the flip side, when on Cosmopolitan.com, I noticed an interesting statement made in an article named “What makes men fall in love”. In it, the author suggested “Give him a job. Ask him to fix or build you something. Performing concrete tasks is a way of bonding that enhances his sense of success. Ask his opinion. Whether it’s about your 401(k) options or the best travel sites, it telegraphs that you value his brain as much as you do his brawn.” To me, this suggests that the woman should be manipulative into pretending that the man is smart and “needed” by the woman. While I only read this one article, I would doubt there are any articles saying that the woman should be herself and try to find a man she likes using a normal approach(actually getting to know the guy without using any tricks or fake personalities). This goes for the men’s magazines as well. I believe these magazines are the reason why America has such a high divorce rate. However, that’s a totally other discussion.
2. According to the Mythological dictionary, Tiresias lost his sight because he got into an argument with Hera saying that women enjoyed sex more than men. While she blinded him, he obtained powers of prophecy. It also stated that he spent some of his life as a woman, so he knew love from both points of view. Personally, I agree with Tiresias for a few reasons. While men may openly talk about sex and have a stereotype of being more “comfortable” with it, women are stereotyped with waiting for the right guy or are the ones in control when it comes to having sex. So because of this wait, it is more meaningful to them and won’t have sex with any guy they don’t feel comfortable with. Also, biologically it is true because women are capable of having multiple orgasms while men can’t. Guys, if you don’t believe me then look it up.
3. I believe Capellanus’ text is similar to my views on love because he states general rules that are the base of many articles and so called relationship experts. For example, he states, “When a lover suddenly has sight of his beloved, his heart beats wildly” or “4. Love is always growing or diminishing”. He didn’t take years of research to find this out but these are things that everyone encounters and feels when they meet someone they believe they are in love with. I personally believe many people in today’s society misconstrued love and mistake it for sexual desire or a feeling of being wanted. Also, shows such as Gossip Girl or other teen soaps make young adults feel as if they need love in their lives in order to fit in. I feel true love doesn’t come in a few months or right away, however it takes years to know a person and full understanding if love is there or not.
2. According to the Mythological dictionary, Tiresias lost his sight because he got into an argument with Hera saying that women enjoyed sex more than men. While she blinded him, he obtained powers of prophecy. It also stated that he spent some of his life as a woman, so he knew love from both points of view. Personally, I agree with Tiresias for a few reasons. While men may openly talk about sex and have a stereotype of being more “comfortable” with it, women are stereotyped with waiting for the right guy or are the ones in control when it comes to having sex. So because of this wait, it is more meaningful to them and won’t have sex with any guy they don’t feel comfortable with. Also, biologically it is true because women are capable of having multiple orgasms while men can’t. Guys, if you don’t believe me then look it up.
3. I believe Capellanus’ text is similar to my views on love because he states general rules that are the base of many articles and so called relationship experts. For example, he states, “When a lover suddenly has sight of his beloved, his heart beats wildly” or “4. Love is always growing or diminishing”. He didn’t take years of research to find this out but these are things that everyone encounters and feels when they meet someone they believe they are in love with. I personally believe many people in today’s society misconstrued love and mistake it for sexual desire or a feeling of being wanted. Also, shows such as Gossip Girl or other teen soaps make young adults feel as if they need love in their lives in order to fit in. I feel true love doesn’t come in a few months or right away, however it takes years to know a person and full understanding if love is there or not.
Ovid's description of love is generally self-centered compared to current descriptions of "how to find love". I read a couple of different articles on Askmen.com and Menshealth.com, both of which suggested ways to attract women. Ovid's description of love seemed as if a man could simply choose who he loved. Today we see a number of pick-up lines and ice breakers that will interest the opposite sex. Although most don't really work, there is a general consensus that we are trying to impress the OTHER person. Ovid's description of love was extremely selfish, "choose one whom you can call your only love." Ovid doesn't realize that love is a two way street. You can't "choose" someone and decide to love them. Ovid's cure for love was also a lot harsher than many suggest today, although I think his method works best. Ovid's plan is to think of your former love in a bad light. Take any flaws you see in your ex and embellish them in your mind. In order for this to work, you have to completely believe what you are saying. It is a very difficult process to go through but it is very effective. Today, many magazines suggest taking down pictures to wipe away memories or to simply forget your ex. I think that's too hard to do and simply impossible.
Tiresias lived as both a man and a woman at separate times. When asked by Zeus and Hera who enjoyed sex more, men or women, he replied that women enjoyed sex more. Hera, who thought that men enjoyed sex more, blinded Tiresias. Zeus then gave him the power to see into the future because he felt bad for Tiresias. I thought that Hera's punishment was a bit extreme. She is excessively proud. Everyone is wrong sometimes, but I guess since she's a god and all, she can never be wrong. I see this more as a "haha look at me I'm right again" type of deal between Zeus and Hera. It's typical to see the male ego take over after a victory, even if it's a verbal one. Although I believe Hera's punishment to be a bit harsh, it nonetheless taught him a lesson. Sometimes you have to lie to benefit yourself. Unfortunately Tiresias did not get the message, as he once again told the truth to Oedipus in "Oedipus the King" which brought Tiresias to his demise. On whether women enjoy sex more than men, I can only assume that both men and women enjoy sex equally. I'm no Tiresias, and can only speak from a man's perspective. Sex is awesome... just make sure you always use protection... woo!
I do not wholly agree with Capellanus' view of love. I really don't think love follows specific boundaries and rules. To say that blind people cannot love is ridiculous. I believe that you when you are in love with someone, you know it, its as simple as that. There is no specific time allotted before you are allowed to fall in love, be in love, whatever you may call it. Love can happen at anytime, at any age. I'm pretty sure that I loved my family before I was 12 years old. When dealing with the more sensual aspects of love, I still disagree with Capellanus. Physical attraction can only take you so far in a relationship. He seems to be obsessed with the superficial aspects of love, not with the emotional. I do not agree with his view of love at all.
Tiresias lived as both a man and a woman at separate times. When asked by Zeus and Hera who enjoyed sex more, men or women, he replied that women enjoyed sex more. Hera, who thought that men enjoyed sex more, blinded Tiresias. Zeus then gave him the power to see into the future because he felt bad for Tiresias. I thought that Hera's punishment was a bit extreme. She is excessively proud. Everyone is wrong sometimes, but I guess since she's a god and all, she can never be wrong. I see this more as a "haha look at me I'm right again" type of deal between Zeus and Hera. It's typical to see the male ego take over after a victory, even if it's a verbal one. Although I believe Hera's punishment to be a bit harsh, it nonetheless taught him a lesson. Sometimes you have to lie to benefit yourself. Unfortunately Tiresias did not get the message, as he once again told the truth to Oedipus in "Oedipus the King" which brought Tiresias to his demise. On whether women enjoy sex more than men, I can only assume that both men and women enjoy sex equally. I'm no Tiresias, and can only speak from a man's perspective. Sex is awesome... just make sure you always use protection... woo!
I do not wholly agree with Capellanus' view of love. I really don't think love follows specific boundaries and rules. To say that blind people cannot love is ridiculous. I believe that you when you are in love with someone, you know it, its as simple as that. There is no specific time allotted before you are allowed to fall in love, be in love, whatever you may call it. Love can happen at anytime, at any age. I'm pretty sure that I loved my family before I was 12 years old. When dealing with the more sensual aspects of love, I still disagree with Capellanus. Physical attraction can only take you so far in a relationship. He seems to be obsessed with the superficial aspects of love, not with the emotional. I do not agree with his view of love at all.
Monday, October 13, 2008
art of love
1) Ovid’s description of love is very passionate. He believes that one has to find love and that love does not fall out of the sky. There are a lot of beautiful women in the world, and men have to look for that special one with their eyes. Love is about finding that one special person who you could call your only one. Since it is known that men have to ask a female out, the men need to make the first move. Once the male picked out the one, he should get to know her best friend, since she could give good words about the man. A man should always give gifts, knowing that he might not get any in return, and never forget her birthday. Make promises to the lady, that way she will want to stay with you. Always look and smell nice, and if you need to cry to get her to say yes, so do it. And when you kiss, do not be too harsh with her to give her a reason to complain. The same technique won’t work for all women of all ages. With more experience, the men will know how to approach different women. And if she leaves, do not mope after her. Stop thinking about her and do not talk bad about her, since that will only make you think more about her. Do not be alone and have someone to talk to, after a while, the thought of her will go away. From Men’s Dating magazine, one of the tips while approaching a woman is to smile and try to match up her energy. “Not a nervous smile, but a confident, charming smile. Have the smile even if the woman is not looking at you. Having a genuine smile will help give you more confidence as well as create a good first impression”, Men’s Dating magazine. 2008. Google. 13 Oct. 2008 . How to deal with a breakup? Well one of the magazines suggests “She'll spend a lot of this new time together dissecting your every word, looking for a glimmer of potential reconciliation. Even casually chatting about "old times" can give her false hope, so try to avoid it altogether”, Askmen.com.2008. EGN Entertainment, Inc. 13 Oct. 2008 .
2) Tiresias was a person who experienced love from both sexes. No, he was not bisexual, rather he was punished by Gods and turned into a female and then back into a male. When Zeus and Hera were having an argument about who enjoys sex more, they decided to ask Tiresias since he knew both sensations. His answer proved Hera wrong since she believed that men enjoyed it more. In rage, she turned Tiresias blind and in compensation, Zeus gifted Tiresias with the power of seeing the future. I would say that the incident with Hera made Tiresias be more aware of his knowledge and sometimes not tell people the truth. As in Oedipus the King, we see that Tiresias’ knowledge gets him in trouble again, when Oedipus calls him a liar and a schemer just because he does not believe the prophecy. By saying that women enjoy sex more, I believe that Tiresias is inclining that for women it is easier to seduce a man and women have the power to drive men crazy, whereas for men, sex is more about just getting it and hoping to have a boy.
3)Capellanus mentions that men and women after certain ages cannot love. I would have to disagree because I believe that anyone could find love at any age, because love is not only about attraction to another sex, but also about the feelings of being loved, cared about, and trusting someone with all your secrets. He also mentions that blind persons cannot love because they cannot see unless they loved before they went blind. I would have to also disagree with that since, as I mentioned before, love is not only attraction, therefore to a blind being, looks do not matter, they might fall in love by other characteristics, such as scent, voice, touch and intelligence. I do agree with the fact that “ he who is not jealous can not love” because jealousy arises when someone who cares about another, does not want to lose him or her to someone else. “ A new love expels an old one”, is very true because you cannot love two people for the same reasons at the same time. If one starts a relationship with another and still has feelings for his or her ex, it will be impossible to fall in love with the present if that person still thinks about the past. “Nothing prevents a woman from being loved by two men, or a man from being loved by two women”, shows that it is possible to be loved by many people, but love could only be returned to one person because loving more than one, is not love, it becomes lust and greediness.
2) Tiresias was a person who experienced love from both sexes. No, he was not bisexual, rather he was punished by Gods and turned into a female and then back into a male. When Zeus and Hera were having an argument about who enjoys sex more, they decided to ask Tiresias since he knew both sensations. His answer proved Hera wrong since she believed that men enjoyed it more. In rage, she turned Tiresias blind and in compensation, Zeus gifted Tiresias with the power of seeing the future. I would say that the incident with Hera made Tiresias be more aware of his knowledge and sometimes not tell people the truth. As in Oedipus the King, we see that Tiresias’ knowledge gets him in trouble again, when Oedipus calls him a liar and a schemer just because he does not believe the prophecy. By saying that women enjoy sex more, I believe that Tiresias is inclining that for women it is easier to seduce a man and women have the power to drive men crazy, whereas for men, sex is more about just getting it and hoping to have a boy.
3)Capellanus mentions that men and women after certain ages cannot love. I would have to disagree because I believe that anyone could find love at any age, because love is not only about attraction to another sex, but also about the feelings of being loved, cared about, and trusting someone with all your secrets. He also mentions that blind persons cannot love because they cannot see unless they loved before they went blind. I would have to also disagree with that since, as I mentioned before, love is not only attraction, therefore to a blind being, looks do not matter, they might fall in love by other characteristics, such as scent, voice, touch and intelligence. I do agree with the fact that “ he who is not jealous can not love” because jealousy arises when someone who cares about another, does not want to lose him or her to someone else. “ A new love expels an old one”, is very true because you cannot love two people for the same reasons at the same time. If one starts a relationship with another and still has feelings for his or her ex, it will be impossible to fall in love with the present if that person still thinks about the past. “Nothing prevents a woman from being loved by two men, or a man from being loved by two women”, shows that it is possible to be loved by many people, but love could only be returned to one person because loving more than one, is not love, it becomes lust and greediness.
Courtly Love
1-Regarding the Description of love, Ovid tried to teach how to get the heart of a woman and how to keep it. Basically Ovid states that it is important to “light the fire of passion in the soul, choose one whom you can call your only love, to find a fitting mistress, use your eyes.” I saw an article in Menshealth.com about how to seduce her in 10 minutes: your approach, your introduction, your voice, your conversation, your body language and your first impression. I think that the Menshealth article shows better what a woman expected from a man.
How to cure oneself from heartache from the eye of Ovid basically the men need “Keep their doors open”, “don’t ask what she is doing”, “let your indifference is enough”, which means forget about the past an move on. According to Ovid’s comments, it is easer for men to cure heartache then for women. On the other hand, what I noted in some websites comments, such as answers.yahoo.com, that heartache is difficult to be cure for both men and women. One specific comment attracted my attention because shows a sensitive side of men. A man made a comment about how the society conditioned the men since child to “act lie a man”, be “tough” and “get over it”, but forget that men are human being and that have feelings too. People have the wrong idea that “men get over heartbreak quicker than women”. The society makes men to move on by pretending they are not caring it, and some of them end up by drinking, fighting or making rude comments about their ex.
2- Tiresias lived as men and women and he/she had the experience as both men and women. One day, Zeus and Hera were having a discussion about who enjoyed sex more and asked Tiresias to tell his/her opinion. Teresias answered that the women enjoyed sex more then men (I don’t really know if he /she answered this because he really preferred to be a woman than a man, or if he was afraid of Zeus's power.) Hera got ferocious with his answer and made him blind. Zeus trying to help Tiresias gave him the power to be a prophet. One day he was forced to reveal Oedipus about his destiny, that Oedipus killed his father and had kids with his mother.
3- I partially agree with Capellanus’ rules; some rules I agree and some I disagree. I agree that Marriage is no excuse for not loving. There is a difference between passion and love. First starts with passion and after years of marriage the passion decrease, but on the other hand the true love appears. No marriage survives without love, but we must love ourselves too. Also I agree that “a new love expels an old one”. There is an expression in my country that says: the best way to cure heart break is to find another one to love.
I do not agree that there is an “age limit” for love. It states that a woman over 50 and a man over 60 cannot love; this is a discrimination against old people. I have a couple of friends that found love after 50 and they are very happy. On the other hand I know a lot of young couples that got married young and their marriage didn’t last for so long. It concludes that there is no age for love.
How to cure oneself from heartache from the eye of Ovid basically the men need “Keep their doors open”, “don’t ask what she is doing”, “let your indifference is enough”, which means forget about the past an move on. According to Ovid’s comments, it is easer for men to cure heartache then for women. On the other hand, what I noted in some websites comments, such as answers.yahoo.com, that heartache is difficult to be cure for both men and women. One specific comment attracted my attention because shows a sensitive side of men. A man made a comment about how the society conditioned the men since child to “act lie a man”, be “tough” and “get over it”, but forget that men are human being and that have feelings too. People have the wrong idea that “men get over heartbreak quicker than women”. The society makes men to move on by pretending they are not caring it, and some of them end up by drinking, fighting or making rude comments about their ex.
2- Tiresias lived as men and women and he/she had the experience as both men and women. One day, Zeus and Hera were having a discussion about who enjoyed sex more and asked Tiresias to tell his/her opinion. Teresias answered that the women enjoyed sex more then men (I don’t really know if he /she answered this because he really preferred to be a woman than a man, or if he was afraid of Zeus's power.) Hera got ferocious with his answer and made him blind. Zeus trying to help Tiresias gave him the power to be a prophet. One day he was forced to reveal Oedipus about his destiny, that Oedipus killed his father and had kids with his mother.
3- I partially agree with Capellanus’ rules; some rules I agree and some I disagree. I agree that Marriage is no excuse for not loving. There is a difference between passion and love. First starts with passion and after years of marriage the passion decrease, but on the other hand the true love appears. No marriage survives without love, but we must love ourselves too. Also I agree that “a new love expels an old one”. There is an expression in my country that says: the best way to cure heart break is to find another one to love.
I do not agree that there is an “age limit” for love. It states that a woman over 50 and a man over 60 cannot love; this is a discrimination against old people. I have a couple of friends that found love after 50 and they are very happy. On the other hand I know a lot of young couples that got married young and their marriage didn’t last for so long. It concludes that there is no age for love.
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